Posted on by Californiacontrarian

Open & Close

 

In general if someone says that he/she likes going to the dentist, that person is going to be considered a bit unusual or bizarre. I have nothing against dentists, and am not an “anti-dentite”, but what kind of normal person actually likes going to the dentist??

Me, I like going to the dentist, or more precisely, I like going to the dentist’s office. Today I went for my six month cleaning and check-up, and got there forty minutes early. No, I am not super-compulsive about arriving on time, but rather I wanted to be able to read some of the magazines that he has in his waiting room. I always look forward to reading Sports Illustrated and if there is time, glancing at National Geographic. Was forty minutes going to be enough time?

Shortly after opening S.I., I came upon a letter complaining about an article in the prior issue that unnecessarily criticized Donald Trump, and “what was that doing in a sports magazine?” Now I did not read the article in question (as I had not been in the dentist’s office for six months), but what was that doing in a sports magazine? I then closed the Sports Illustrated, and then opened National Geographic.

Upon opening it, I saw an article about why people lie. It sounded like it could be interesting so I started to read it. The initial example was about a pathological liar who had gotten into an Ivy League school in large part because of all the exaggerated lies on his resume. Then, “Boom!” Out of the blue, the author was talking about Donald Trump! I did not read the rest of this article, but as I skimmed it, I saw that Mr. Trump’s name was mentioned two or three more times. Interestingly, Barack Hussein Obama was not mentioned, even though he had said on multiple occasions, “If you like your doctor, you can keep him.” and he had also promised that our insurance premiums would go down, although it was apparent from the git-go that that was going to be impossible!

There are so many problems with National Geographic that I do not know where to start. First of all, what is an article about liars and lying doing in National Geographic? Did they dramatically change their format over the last six months? Be that as it may, why was Donald Trump essentially called a liar, but B.O. was not even mentioned? Why mention Mr. Trump in the context of other obvious pathological liars? Could it be that the author of this National Geographic article was a biased leftist?! Duh!

I then closed National Geographic, but since all that was left to read was Time and Woman’s Day, I stopped reading altogether. I then started thinking, “Are all of today’s magazines being infiltrated by liberals?” I do not get any magazines at home and I now congratulate myself on my spend-thriftiness. It’s bad enough that our newspapers are infiltrated by liberal opinions, but I had assumed that Sport’s Illustrated and National Geographic would be non-political and thus safe to read. This was not the case, and because I am a man of principle, I vow not to read either Sports Illustrated or National Geographic for the next six months!

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