The other day I referred to the Democratic debates as soporific and made an allusion to Rip Van Winkle, the classic 1819 short story by Washington Irving. In this tale Rip Van Winkle fell asleep and awoke 20 years later to discover the dramatic changes that had occurred while he was asleep, namely the American Revolution and its after effects. Most noticeable was that England’s King George was no longer in charge of the now new United States, and thus his small town at the foot of the Catskill Mountains was no longer considered “English.”
Imagine what things would look like if you had fallen asleep for nine years prior to the upcoming 2020 election. The biggest differences from your pre-sleep U.S.A. in 2019, and the “new and different” U.S.A. in 2028 were a consequence of the 2020 election in which Elizabeth Warren had been elected as the President in a different type of American revolution.
First of all, using her sobriquet, “Pocahauntas,” had been outlawed by decree, and a mere slip of the tongue was now punishable by having to spend 6 months “teaching” at the now universal “preschool,” which was actually just free childcare starting at 6 weeks of age. It was rumored that some actually said “Pocahauntas” on purpose, because “babysitting” at the free universal childcare centers paid the standard minimum wage which had grown to $22.50 per hour, and this was better than being unemployed. The new normal GNP increase hovered at around 0.25%. Amazon, Google, and Facebook were things of the past as President Warren had fulfilled her vendetta against big business. Unfortunately, as a consequence of her animosity to Wall Street and to business in general, the stock market had taken quite a hit and the DJIA had only recently recovered some, now down to only 20% below what it had been prior to the 2016 election of Donald Trump.
Throughout the U.S. especially on the coasts, most youths spent most of their days just hanging out, smoking pot which was now legal federally. Yes, they all had college degrees and were debt free, but there were few jobs. However everything was not bleak as one of the new entrepreneurial businesses would hold a spot for you in the line to see a physician’s assistant for an hourly fee. Because of Medicare-for-all and the abolishment of private medical insurance, schools for physician assistants had been booming, especially with the closure of many now free medical schools, and the retirement of upwards of 50% of practicing older physicians. Again a job as an underpaid physician assistant, earning the minimal wage, was better than no job at all, as in 2028 the unemployment rate had become pretty steady at 9%.
Upon awakening in 2028 and seeing the disastrous consequences of the 2020 Warren election, the first question might be, “How did Warren ever get re-elected in 2024?” The simple answer to that question would be “the abolition of the Electoral College in favor of the popular vote in 2023.” At that time the Democrats convinced all of the pot-smoking, debt-free, unemployed youth that “the popular vote was the only fair way to decide an election.” However, some would argue that the abolition of ICE, and the establishment of a truly open border in 2022 played a significant role in Warren’s 2024 re-election, especially in view of the fact that all illegals were granted the right to vote in 2023!
But be not dismayed, as the Democrats are guaranteeing that things can only get significantly better after the election of Vice President Kamala Harris in 2028!
“WAKE UP NOW, AMERICA!”